So here you are again, the same feeling of disappointment overtaking your emotions and thoughts. Your mind consumed with shame and regret. Why again? Why me? Why can’t I get past this? Look how old I am and still doing this. No one will ever understand. I have to take care of this myself, but I failed so many times. If my wife finds out she’ll be upset or worse; leave me. If anyone finds out, they’ll talk about me for years. Why is this so difficult? I know; I’ll just man up and make it happen. I know the signs. I can do this. No one has to know I’m struggling. I’ve made it this far, and no one has a clue. I’m sure everyone has this issue at one time or another; it’s just taking me longer to shake it that’s all. Just get yourself up and act like nothing happened. This will be the end of it. God please forgive me again for ______. I promise this will never happen again. I know I’ve said it before Lord but this time is different; you’ll give me the strength to change. Thank you, Lord, for you grace and mercy. So here you are again……….
I hope no one recognizes that conversation, but the fact is that all men have had some form of this “talk of shame” with themselves at one time or another. I pray that your situation has changed and you have found deliverance through relationship and accountability. I pray that your worst fears have become your greatest peace in victory. For those that haven’t come to that place just yet, I want you to know that you do not have to battle alone. I wouldn’t be able to type out any form of this “talk of shame” conversation if I had never been there. I have battled my “demons” alone, and it was no fun. They did not stop until I began to understand the true power of accountability through right relationship in Christ Jesus.
Let’s face it, if you read the Bible it doesn’t take a genius to see that everyone battles with something at some point in life. King David, he was called a man after God’s own heart. One would think after all he went through with Bathsheba that he would have been a changed man after that, but yet we find at the end of his life he had taken on countless concubines and a couple wives after her. He essentially ordered the death of one of his best soldiers so that he could take Bathsheba as his wife. Then, they ended up losing their first child. One would think that the man would take a hint. Yet, in the last days of his life his body was so frail that he couldn’t keep warm, the bible tells, and instead of calling for one of his many wives, his servants arrange for a young virgin to be placed in the bed with him to wait on him and to keep him warm. He had issues to say the least. Now I’m not saying all this to say that you will die still struggling with your issues or that it makes it okay. Just because someone else didn’t get victory over their demons does not mean you should just settle in with yours. No sir! I want you to see that you are not alone. You are not the first to struggle. You are not the first to fall. You are not the first to feel shame in failure. You must understand that these are the tactics of the enemy to keep you bound to an addiction that God wants to set you free from. The enemy doesn’t want you to have the knowledge of your strength and authority.
Did you know that you were created for relationship? It’s a fact. God created Adam and Eve for relationship. He walked and talked with them in the garden. God…… God of all, Creator of all, wanted relationship, so He created Adam. He has been chasing us down trying to have a relationship with mankind ever since. This is why I find that accountability is so important. The powers of this world would have us believe that so many things should be taking our time and energy. We get caught up in our own lives and we forget the importance of what we have been created to be. Having accountability with another brother in Christ not only helps to keep us aligned with our relationship with Christ, but it also sets us up to live out the plans that God has for our lives. Look if I get my car stuck in ditch, I may be able to get it out by myself eventually. However, if a friend comes along and helps me push, I have an even greater chance of getting out that ditch. If a friend, who has been in that ditch, shows up to help, and he has all the tools he gained from his experience with him it is no longer if or when I’m getting out of the ditch; it’s how. If he comes by and I tell him I’m not stuck, I’m just hanging out watching the other cars go by, and it’s all good. Then, he leaves with his tools, and I remain stuck. When future rains come, I just continue to sink. All I have to do is have a quick conversation with my friend who has the tools of experience and allow him help me (HELLO! RELATIONSHIP!). Now I have gained those same tools that not only allow me to get out but to stay out and possibly help someone else who I may find stuck one day.
What if Sampson had just been accountable to someone? There would have been no need to die under the rubble of his enemies. What if David had overcome the grip of lust? Maybe Solomon would have not succumbed to the enemy through his relationships with wives of foreign gods. All of Israel could have had a different outcome if these men had learned the power of relationship through accountability. What if you just took a second to look around and find someone with the experience you need and have a conversation with them. You’ll then be changing the outcome of future generations. Your children and your grandchildren changed just because you took time to be accountable and have a right relationship that allowed you to be victorious over a demon your children will now never have to face. You have the keys to overcome any addiction of any kind. God took the keys to death, hell and the grave so that we could live victoriously.
There is a life beyond where you are and it is available to you today! First, you must learn to forgive yourself. Then, you must learn to be accountable to someone. Find a brother in Christ who can pray with you. It’s not about who did what. It’s about getting out from the chains of bondage called shame that the enemy has you fastened to through fear. Fear that someone will know what you are. Fear of what they will say or do. Fear that you’ll have to do something or say something. I’ll ask you this question. Do you want to change, or is it that you just don’t want to be found out? Change will lead you to freedom. Secrecy will chain you to death. The choice is yours………
Please allow me to pray with you.
Father, I ask for forgiveness today for all my sin. I ask you, Father, to take all my shame and fear. I lay my shame and fear at your feet. I cannot change who or where I am under my own strength. I ask you to give me the wisdom, knowledge, and strength to walk out my victory over ________________. I thank you, God, for sending my brother an accountability partner to allow them both to grow and challenge one another to be all that you have for both of them. I thank you, God, for deliverance through the blood of Jesus. Your word says that we were healed by his stripes, and we stand upon that scripture and call for healing and restoration in the name of Jesus for my brother. I speak love, hope, joy, and peace into the life of my brother as he steps out into the freedoms where you created him to be. May your hand be upon him all of his days. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.
M.U.S.C.L.E. 